TOFIX

TOFIX

1. Logical roundup at the end.
   Already noted this before, but the ending with the cops just leaving the place as is, doesn't feel realistic. It'll need at least an extra call to the Chief; Derrek will not make this decision on his own. It is a big change to the story, and will probably turn into more material instead of less.
   
   I'm not even sure how to fix this yet. I think I'll head over to reddit for this.


2. Case roundup at the end
   The current epilogue is a nice final scare, but I forgot to bring the case to any resolution.. Big mistake, not fulfilling the promises. I think I want to do this in a kind of case report, but not too dry, of course. Gonna think this over.


3. Derrek doesn't spot the tractor yet when he enters the mowed field.
   Tiny fix with a low impact, only a single chapter.


4. Chimney fixes
   These are 2 different fixes: one small for the attic. I forgot the chimney coming up from the sitting room.
   The second is a lot bigger. I forgot the chimney coming up from the laundry room through the second floor. This would create some problems with the stairs too, so I'll need to move some things around.


5. General Maps
   At first I wanted to do a map per chapter, showing Derrek's location and what he knows of the area so far. While this is cool, this is a lot of work. I'll cut it down to include some general maps for each area. Including them where relevant to the story. Bad thing is that the reader then knows more than Derrek does, but I think this compromise is fine for now. I prefer realistic orientation.

MAYBEFIX

• Lost opportunities inside the house
  I feel like I went a bit too quick through the inside. I could use more things there, like the basement, sitting room and the pivotal dining room. This would be a bigger impact, some rewrites and mostly new material. I have some inspiration for some rooms, but I could use this for future stories too.


• Chapter maps
  Each chapter starts with a map showing the area Derrek is in, where he is (with a small police cap) and what he has explored so far. I like this idea, but it's a bit too much for now. I first need to get the original layout final before I could start on this.


• Bluetooth tracking - Kitchen
  I had everything set for Derrek to track one teen by moving the bluetooth box around… yet I totally forgot while writing. I'm not sure if I can get this fitted in anymore, will depend on the reread of that scene.

HAPPYLIST

• Derrek as a character
  I reflected him a lot on myself, how I would think and react given such situations, but I think he has grown more loose over the first draft. I wouldn't have pushed through most of the final things.


• Attic, Dining room and Barn scenes
  These are the bigger scenes, but I really like how these turned out. I don't expect to change these a lot except for maybe some more descriptions. These were most fun to write too.


• Outside
  The movements outside feel realistic and I think there's some good switching between action and slow scenes in this part. Whereas the inside is more messy.
  
  
• A chapter per location
  I'm happy I wrote it this way. This was easier for me to write too, as there aren't any actual breaks in between things happening. Each movement is a small cliffhanger on its own, peeking through the door.